I don’t want this to sound like a linguist statement or anything but…
Modern colloquialisms make us all crazy. And with the growth and popularization of the internet, we actually get to watch language evolve in near real-time.
Drihten me reat, ne byth me nanes godes wan.
And he me geset on swythe good feohland.
And fedde me be waetera stathum.
Our Lord gourneth me, and nothyng shal defailen to me.
In the sted of pastur he sett me ther.
He norissed me upon water of fyllyng.
The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures.
He leadeth me beside the still waters.
The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He lets me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me to still waters.
teh lord iz mai homie don wan no nuffin
o shit waddup tek dat chill wit mi bae
fam drank dat thang
Very Far Future
It’s just a bunch of emoji pictograms unintelligible to modern audiences.
The future sounds moronic. But… if we had the ability to talk with someone who only understood Middle English, they’d think we’re the idiots.
Language evolves, and annoying and as crazy as it makes us, basically we need to get over it.
I wish I had thought up a “future version” whilst I was in school having to read aloud the Lord’s prayer at morning assembly. Would have at least made it more interesting than twisting the lyrics to “Morning Has Broken” when we all had to sing.
That said, though language evolves, you talk and write like the future version today, I still ain’t gonna (“ain’t gonna” really?!?) hire you.