Me: “I need to transmit about 8K of data…”
The Helpful Plugin: “I think you mean 8 kilobits.”
Me: “I need to transmit a little over 8 kilobytes of data, which is around 8,000 bytes.”
The Helpful Plugin: “It’s 8,192 bytes actually.”
Me: “I’m going to use a for loop here.”
The Helpful Plugin: “You should use a for each loop.”
Me: “I’m going to use a for loop here that will iterate, not enumerate, from index 0 through 8,200…”
The Helpful Plugin: “That looks bigger than 8KB of data, also, zero is a hard-coded number, you should consider a named constant!”
Me: “As I iterate over the bytes, I will perform a Fast Fourier Transform on the data.”
The Helpful Plugin: “Have you considered parallelizing it to make it run faster?”
Me: “Over a very slow, serial connection that is prone to timing issues. But it appears that my math is off…”
The Helpful Plugin: …strangely silent when it comes to a real bug…
Me: “Ah, here is my math error, let me make a note in a git commit…”
The Helpful Plugin: “You should put a comma after the word ‘and’ to make it more grammatically correct.”
Me: “Shut. The. FUCK. Up!”